Why Modern Cars Suck, Or Not

In the October edition of the overpriced Brit stroke mag Octane, car dork Jay Leno gives his take on why modern cars are as soulless as washing machines. He blames car critics.
"Nowadays any car that's less than an A-minus when it leave the factory -- omigod, you're out of business, you're screwed. Nobody can afford to take any kind of chance anymore so ... everything looks like a Camry."
Jay goes off on his version of the blame the media rant based on a story about his Ford GT, which was discontinued in 2006. Seems a LA Times car critic (yes, probably that car critic) took the car to task after the it got recalled, and Jay holds a grudge.
Interesting theory, but we think Jay's off base. Who the fuck reads car critics? And which car critics are touting the new Camry? The reason cars looks like Camrys is because the art of driving has been debased by clogged roads and the general assholery of contemporary drivers. For most people driving is less fun than doing the laundry. Rush hour traffic in a 63 Corvette would be scary as hell. Best bet, your car gets wrecked. Worst bet, the lady putting on makeup ghosts you with her Audi. We demand lifeless cocoons because we value safety over soul. And because we can't afford Ford GTs.
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Update: The Thrill Chill

Here at Rumblenote, we've been getting some flack lately from our readers. They've noticed we've been slacking off on our daily posts, and that cheap thrills haven't been up to snuff. We agree. And here's the reason: There hasn't been a cool cheap car on Craiglist in the DC/Baltimore area for weeks. Call it a cheap thrill chill. Sure, we can find way overpriced '62 Novas with V6s that the owners somehow say are all original. And cheap '61 Ford Falcons with two too many doors. But nothing we'd consider buying.
In this morass of overpriced and under-thrilling vehicles, we think the best cheap thrill on the local market is the 1971 Fiat 850 we features a while back. This rear-engine cutie has a new dropped price of $3,999. Try to find one of these for $2,000 more. They don't exist. For a city get around car, we think this guy can't be beat.
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Floor Mats Floor Toyotas

As a frequent customer of Budget and Enterprise, I've long wondered why the hell rental cars always remove the floor mats from their cars. Toyota's recall today of 3.8 million Toyota and Lexus cars over faulty floor mats may shed some light on the mystery.
For those who haven't heard, Toyota announced the recall because the floor mats have somehow caused rapid acceleration that led in many cases to crashes, and in at least one case may have led to a family's death. According to the Detroit Free Press, one guy claims a floor mat malfunction caused his Toyota to hit speeds of over 100 mph over a six-mile cruise, which seems about right given the horsepower to weight ratio of the average Toyota.
Here at Rumblenote, we can't imagine the physics behind how a floor mat could cause acceleration, though we admit we spend as little time as possible in Toyotas. We have, however, run across the bunched up winter floor mat under the break pedal effect, which certainly makes breaking a challenge. But what we really want to know is if Budget has been looking out for us all this time, or if another reason is behind the missing mats.
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Cash for Clunkers: The WTF File

We all knew that cash for clunkers was a stupid idea. Seems it was a worse idea yet for the fools who traded in exotic sports and luxury cars in the program. According to the Detroit Free Press, the clunkers WTF file includes a 1997 Aston Martin DB7 like the one above, a 1985 Maserati, a Shelby Cobra replica, a 1997 Bentley and a 1987 Buick GNX.
The Freep found the cars by combing through federal clunkers program data. The data doesn't mention the condition of the cars, or the mind set of owners willing to give up a Maserati for a few thousand bucks toward a Camry. Nor does it tell which junkyard received the windfall. But we doubt these cars wound up in the crusher.
--Thanks Faler for the tip.
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Cheap Thrills: Delivers the Mail

It's blue. It's got sliding doors. It was made in in 1972. It's a Jeep in Jessup, Maryland. It may have once delivered the mail. It costs $1500. What else do you need to know? The ad doesn't give us much but a telephone number. A fine field beater, we think. Read More

Where New Beats Old

If you've been here before, you'll know we don't think much of new cars. They don't have the style or the soul of the classics. But they do have this going for them -- they're less likely to kill you. Check out this crash test of a 2009 Malibu verses a 1959 Bel Air. The Insurance Institute for Highway Safety staged the test to illustrate safety advances of the last 50 years. Now if only they could make that Malibu pretty. Read More

DC Frees the Clunkers

Come October, beater drivers in the District will no longer be forced to submit their rigs for annual safety checks. Here at Rumblenote, we applaud the District government for getting rid of this nonsense. Some, however, worry that shit cars on the road will create a dangerous driving situation in the city (mechanics, we're sure). We, of course, disagree. After all, it can't get much worse. Just ask the good hands folks at Allstate.
According to Allstate, drivers in Washington crash with more frequency than anywhere else in the country. That statistic has everything to do with driving like an asshole (still against the law) and little to do with tire tread, we are pretty sure.
So if it's the safety inspection that's holding you back from picking up a sweet classic ride, you're free to buy. And maybe if folks think you might not have the brakes, they might stop pulling out in front of you.
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Cheap Thrills: Chevy Pickup

This 1956 Chevy pickup in Baltimore is listed as a project. But outside of the exterior coat of many colors and missing front bumper (which we think looks about right on a truck this old) the project seems about finished.
And what has been done already looks done right.The engine bay appears as I imagine it must have when the original owner drove it home. That's a Blue Flame six-cylinder hooked up to a three-speed on the column, which makes this truck a blast to drive.
The interior also looksin excellent shape with a redone bench seat. Seller is asking $4,000. Seems like an excellent starting point for serious negotiation. Get this on the street and enjoy it. Or shoot it with a coat of red and have one fine truck. Either way, a fun winter project. Read More

Greening the Streets: Stepside

This multicolored Chevy stepside is the coolest pickup we've seen in a while. We spotted it on Sunday on Cathedral Street in Baltimore. It would look great with a paint job. But first things first. How about a new front tire? Read More

Jeff's Pic: Jetsons Look Tempest

It's been six months since my older brother passed on a cool ride tip. Last time it was a Fiat street rod. This time it's even more bizarre. What is that? A Pinewood Derby creation done large? I couldn't have guessed before reading the ebay listing, but it's a 1962 Pontiac Tempest rat rod. Proves once again that anything can be made cool with a bit of creativity, except, of course, a Ford Maverick.
The Tempest has been chopped, channeled, slammed, prodded and put through a food processor. It's powered by a Chrysler big blog. Brakes come off a 1942 Ford. Which means it's fast as hell and can't stop for shit, which is the definition of rat rod, I think. Check out the interior: a set of bomber seats and a sawed-off wheel to go with the safety first theme. Seller assures us this thing stands out of a crowd and draws attention. Really? But we still can't decide if that's a good thing. The car is so bizarre, we're at a loss for words.
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Cheap Thrills: Jeep in a Box

At first glance, this 1948 Willys Jeep in Annapolis looks like a great candidate for best cheap thrill ever. It's a solid and classic prime beater at an asking price of $1,800. Sure it has issues, you'd think, but for that kind of cash what do you expect? Maybe he'll take less anyway.
Of course that dream would be too good to be true. For the owner of this Willys has gone down the well worn path of destruction. Instead of letting the Willys smoke like pipe, he decided to go for a rebuild, but didn't get much beyond teardown.
So instead of foul-running cheap Willy's, you get a Jeep in a box, which is far less of a good deal. It's not quite clear how far the engine teardown went. Though with the engine out, we say screw it for a rebuild (parts can't be cheap). What would you put in it instead?
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Cheap Thrills: BWM 2002

At $4,500, this 1973 BMW 2002 is beyond the borders of cheap thrills land, but we're hoping the O.B.O. bit in the advertisement will bring it around. It's a great looking car, but make sure you have a good set of tools 'cause it sounds like this one will make good use of them.
Owner says it's got a bit of rust. We'd be surprised if it didn't. The worries don't stop there. Seller says it's tough to downshift without grinding, so the syncros are probably shot. It runs hot and needs at least a top-end rebuild, as evidenced by the smoke out the tailpipe when you let off the throttle.
So what is it we like about this car? Well, it's a 2002, the coolest sports sedan ever built. Ever since we drove "Emily," a super-fine example light years beyond this one, we've been hooked on these cars.
We also like the interior of this one. Looks clean as can be. And although Panasports on a 2002 are getting kind of boring, can't say we don't like the look.
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T-bolt Needs Home, and Engine

With the weather getting cooler, it's time to start thinking about winter projects. If you're looking for an easy one, and happen to have a big block Ford engine sitting in your garage, can't go wrong with this 1964 Thunderbolt clone. At $5,500, we're thinking it's a little pricey, since it doesn't move under its own power. But then again, for our money, the Fairlane is one of the best looking cars Ford ever built. And this one has lots of goodies.
The car started out life as a '64 Fairlane before it received the hood bulge to make it look like a Thunderbolt, the strip cars Ford's special vehicle department developed to compete Max Wedge Mopars. The also owner added a nine inch with 411 gears and a brand new front end. It's a factory 4-speed car with factory bucket seats. The owner says he put in motor mounts for a 429. The rest is up to you.
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Rocket Man?

Fan of airplane terrorists and all around Libyan goof Muammar Gaddafi is apparently quite the gearhead. According to the BBC, Gaddafi, who has been trying to improve his image, designed a super safe sedan with the looks of a rocket. Some tyrants build rockets to kill folks, others to keep folks safe, he told reporters, or something like that.
Gadaffi's people are calling the "Libyan rocket" the safest car in the world. It's got a defense system, run-flat tires and bumpers that collapse on impact. It's got a V-6 and is made with Libyan marble and fine leather.
Why no rocket engine? Seems like the Libyan desert would be an awesome place to go for land speed records. Next time, Muammar, give it rocket power and a color scheme like the print on your shirt and we'll be really impressed. Read More

On Wheels: Fuel Atomization

I'm half-way through Matthew B. Crawford's "Shop Class as Soulcraft," which argues the loss of public school shop class is ruining America. Still not sure if I like it. Unfortunately, Crawford writes like the philosophy Ph.D. that he is (no that's not a good thing). But every once in a while he comes off with a nice passage, like this one on the struggle to fire up a vintage motorcycle.

The thing about kick-starters is, they tend to kick back. This is especially likely if you don't retard the timing far enough, as then the motor backfires mechanically, as it were, through the kick-starter, sending your shin to its fated meeting with the foot peg.... Having positioned the piston at the start of its intake stroke, you are ready to kick start the bike. But first check to make sure there are no attractive women present to witness your display, nor any of your rivals, for it is likely to be a drama of strenuous impotence.
Before taking that first kick, it is traditional to light a cigarette and set it dangling at an angle that suggests nonchalance. While you are at it, send up a little prayer for fuel atomization. You wouldn't be riding a motorcycle if you weren't an optimist.

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