Why Modern Cars Suck, Or Not

In the October edition of the overpriced Brit stroke mag Octane, car dork Jay Leno gives his take on why modern cars are as soulless as washing machines. He blames car critics.
"Nowadays any car that's less than an A-minus when it leave the factory -- omigod, you're out of business, you're screwed. Nobody can afford to take any kind of chance anymore so ... everything looks like a Camry."
Jay goes off on his version of the blame the media rant based on a story about his Ford GT, which was discontinued in 2006. Seems a LA Times car critic (yes, probably that car critic) took the car to task after the it got recalled, and Jay holds a grudge.
Interesting theory, but we think Jay's off base. Who the fuck reads car critics? And which car critics are touting the new Camry? The reason cars looks like Camrys is because the art of driving has been debased by clogged roads and the general assholery of contemporary drivers. For most people driving is less fun than doing the laundry. Rush hour traffic in a 63 Corvette would be scary as hell. Best bet, your car gets wrecked. Worst bet, the lady putting on makeup ghosts you with her Audi. We demand lifeless cocoons because we value safety over soul. And because we can't afford Ford GTs.